Love can be a very strong emotion that many people feel at least once in their lives. Lots seek for this feeling which can not only be good, but also incredibly bad depending on how you deal with it. How you interpret it can also influence many of the decisions you make. This essay goes in depth on the concept of “Love at first sight” and whether or not it is a real thing and if there are any exceptions.
To first begin, the understanding of love and what it is has to first be established. There are many definitions and interpretations of it, but for the sake of argument, one definition will be established and referred to; “Love is the strong and positive emotions and behaviors characterized by passion, intimacy, and commitment.” This definition of love is simple but defines this interesting and very in depth concept very well. For further understanding, one can see how it relates or contradicts with “love at first sight”
Passion can be defined as an incredibly strong and “barely” controllable emotion to a person or thing. This feeling can happen at first sight. For example, a man sees a beautiful woman. He can look at her and can instantly have a passion for her. Although it may not be as strong as it can be, it is still present. This passion for one can lead to the development of a relationship. The man would most likely find himself wanting to interact with the woman or learn more about her. This passion can grow further as a relationship is established and built, but it can’t reach its peak instantly.
This passion can lead to intimacy between the two people but it isn’t immediately settled. Passion can lead to intimacy, but it isn’t built up right at that moment. Intimacy can be defined as close familiarity or friendship; closeness. We can compare this to a book; one sees a book and finds it interesting and reads it with curiosity and some passion. Two traits that can be the driving force behind the intent of wanting to read more. That person reads the book and in the end, they have built some sort of relationship with the book. That person has learned the various details about this book and various other facts. This building of a relationship is not instant. Just as one reads a book to learn more, the same applies to humans and each other. An establishment of a relationship can be done at first sight, but it doesn’t have much strength.
Commitment is one of the more self-explanatory parts of love. Commitment is essentially a dedication towards a certain thing. In this case, it is towards a person and the want to build and develop a relationship. This desire to grow closer to someone can happen at first sight. This commitment isn’t necessarily towards the person though, it is more to a relationship instead to the person. As you grow in a relationship further, this commitment can also change towards the person. It takes time before one becomes committed towards another. In the end though, commitment takes a bit of time to get straight and “figured out”.
With the definition of love established and more understood, there can be a better and more in-depth discussion of “love at first sight”. Love at first sight describes the moment in which you feel an instant connection with someone. This connection isn’t necessarily strong or well defined, but it is still somewhat present. Media today describes it as a moment characterized by intense longing and extreme attraction to another person with little to no reasoning behind it.
One of the main reasons for the argument on why “love at first sight” isn’t true is objectification, the act of treating someone more as an object. Objectification can also be defined as dehumanizing another and treating them with less dignity. This is the one major case where “love at first sight” isn’t true.
A man sees a woman with certain physical aspects that appeal to him and he instantly falls in love with her, or, is he falling in love with those aspects. Another way this can be interpreted is: Is he in love with her, or, is he in love with the idea of her? This is the act of objectification. The man is looking at the woman and instead of seeing her as a real human being with dignity. He is seeing her as “his” and not one he can build and develop a relationship with. It is likely that he is thinking about how he can build and develop a relationship with her for those physical aspects. This is the act of sexulization. Sexulization is essentially a type of objectification. However, it mainly focused on sexual desire.
When someone falls “in love” with the act of sexualization, this love is not true. If there even is any love at all, it is still focused on sexual or physical desire. The act of passion can still happen with sexualization but instead of the passion being for the person, it is for their physical traits. This act of sexualization undermines one’s true value of who they are as a person and what they can be. This can be compared to a car. A man wants a car but instead of wanting it for its proper and true use of getting to various places, he wants it because of how it looks or feels. Sexualization and objectification can actually lead to different health problems such as eating disorders, anxiety, or shame of how one personally feels on how they look. It can be argued however, that this sexualization happens so often because women want to meet the men’s standards of the “perfect woman”.
“Love at first sight” isn’t true when it comes to sexualization. However, it also isn’t when one has evil intentions for the other. One could be purposely “falling in love” and manipulating the other and their choices. Ultimately, “love at first sight” isn’t true when there are evil intentions.
When “Love at first sight” happens but not with the act of objectification being the driving factor, it can be partially true. Say for example a woman sees a man doing good deeds around the community. She can fall in “love” with his acts of good and other various traits. But even so, is it love? Or is it a passion? Once again, there is this dilemma where one has a strong passion but mistakes it for love. This passion can almost always lead to love, but passion isn’t love first thing. In this case of “love at first sight”, it should really be called “Passion at first sight”. There isn’t any love or strong connection. It’s simply just a passion and no more. However, this never means that this passion can lead to more. When this passion at first sight occurs, and it is good with no evil desire, this can lead to love.
So in the end, love at first sight can happen in some cases. However, it isn’t necessarily true love. The main difference being, true love is more developed. But even true love has its own meanings. People interpret it differently from others and the understanding of it can easily change. Even if love at first sight happens, it can’t really be called love. Rather, it can and probably should be called “Attraction at first sight”. There is nothing wrong with attraction at first sight, but love is a more complicated concept. The main issue with society is that the word love is simply thrown around too often. The word isn’t used carefully. Now, when someone has even the slightest of feelings, it is considered as love. But one main question remains: “Is it attraction or passion at first sight?” Truthfully, it depends on the case. Like water flowing down a river, love retains no constant state, flow, or shape. There are too many exceptions for not only love, but also life, to have proper and official definitions for these in-depth concepts.